DVD & BLU RAY REVIEWS
Reviews by JAIME PINA
Blood Feast (2016)
Synapse Films
I believe it was John Waters who once described the films of Herschell Gordon Lewis as being similar to porn flicks with gory violence in place of sex. Now I regard Lewis’ films as little masterpieces of weirdo cinema but recent trends how gore is presented in the genre Lewis and partner David F. Friedman created have been dubbed “torture porn”. But I believe movies like the original BLOOD FEAST, 2000 MANIACS, and THE WIZARD OF GORE are worlds away from the SAW franchise.
And the Lewis legacy needs to be more understood by filmmakers looking to recapture the magic. The first being Jackie Kong’s disastrous BLOOD DINER. With a script by Michael Sonye aka Dukey Flyswatter of the band HAUNTED GARAGE, the film was unfunny and the director seemed uninterested in the subject matter. Much better was 2002’s BLOOD DINER: ALL YOU CAN EAT. While claiming to be directed by Herschell Gordon Lewis (with Dave Friedman returning as producer), rumors had it that Lewis only directed the gore scenes and that Friedman’s credit was out of respect. This mattered little because the film was pretty fun and had a great rock soundtrack. Other films given a makeover included 2001 MANIACS (unwatchable) and Crispin Glover and other interesting cast members in a remake of THE WIZARD OF GORE and I have yet to view that film.
And that brings us to German filmmaker Marcel Walz’s remake of BLOOD FEAST. While I can understand the desire to recreate BLOOD FEAST for the torture porn crowd the film, like the SAW franchise and the Rob Zombie flicks, has no real OOOMPH to it in my opinion. Taking place in France where Fuad Ramses and his wife and daughter have relocated and opened up a diner (in an obvious nod to BLOOD DINER), Fuad is losing money and goes off his meds. He takes a job as a nightwatchman at a museum showing Egyptian artifacts and has visions of the Goddess Ishtar demanding he take human lives in order to bring her back to this earthly plane. And the fresh corpses solve his problem of purchasing meat for the diner.
Starring Robert Rusler (WEIRD SCIENCE, A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET PART 2), Caroline Williams (TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE 2, VEROTIKA) and Sophie Monk (a BLINK-182 video) the cast does its best elevate the material but there is little to work with. Rusler resembles failed politician Kevin McCarthy in a suit leftover from RESERVOIR DOGS. The scenes where he is visited by the Goddess Ishtar don’t really work as the actress playing the Goddess looks and acts more like a stripper than a Goddess. The gore scenes seem few and far between and you don’t really care about the daughters’ goofy friends. HGL makes a cameo appearance as an Egyptologist via a computer screen. On the plus side the photography is beautiful and sometimes quite stunning. This is the reason to get this on 4K. The sequences where Fuad binds and murders his victims are shot with an interesting balance of stark light on the victims while Fuad is partly in shadow. These scenes are effective compared with the rest of the film
Some films are just not to be remade. I don’t want to see another director’s fresh new vision of PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE because the original is fine just the way it is. For me, it is the same with BLOOD FEAST. But modern gore hounds who enjoy this sort of thing will
want to check out this reboot of the grandaddy of gore cinema. This release is a 4K disc only with no Blu-ray included. It is the original uncut version which leads me to believe that the version that was available on streaming services a while back may have been edited. There is a trailer, a “Making of” featurette, a music video and footage from the 2018 premiere.
The Long Arm Of The Law Parts I & II
88 Films/MVD
The first two Long Arm Of The Law films are considered early examples of the “Heroic Bloodshed” genre from Hong Kong filmmakers. The genre usually tells stories involving criminals with a strong sense of honor, living by a code of ethics that dictates they will stick together no matter how heavy their situations get. But the main draw in films like these are the sequences of balletic gunplay and chase scenes involving fast paced action, lots of blood and a hail of bullets. The DNA of this genre can be traced to films like Sam Peckinpah’s THE WILD BUNCH, George A. Romero’s DAWN OF THE DEAD and John Carpenter’s ASSAULT ON PRECINT 13 just to name a few.
In the first LONG ARM OF THE LAW we meet a group of criminals who at first seem to be completely inept or having extremely bad luck. They attempt a few botched scores but when they blow the big one toward the end the action really heats up and the extended chase with cops around every corner is exhilarating. Sammo Hung was a co-producer and his stunt team handles the action. In an early chase scene one of the actors almost gets hit by a car for real. The film has some murkiness and is not very slick but that suits the griminess of the story these hard luck criminals are going through.
The acting is good and by the end you really start pulling for the inept brothers in crime to escape the cops. The shoot outs are intense and the stunts are exciting. One scene involves a guy getting shot and falling onto an ice rink with his bloodied pulp caroming from side to side leaving a zig-zagged blood trail.
The second LONG ARM OF THE LAW film features scenes from the first film in the beginning but has nothing to do with the first. The main thing bringing the two films together is that both involve the Big Circle Gang and people of questionable backgrounds from mainland China seeking refuge in Hong Kong. In this film former cops are given a chance to remain in Hong Kong if they do undercover work. As they work to infiltrate the criminal underground things start to slide out of control and by the time they are to assist in a bank heist, things have spun hopelessly out of control. This film seems to have had a bigger budget than its predecessor but both films kick some serious butt and are required viewing for HK or action-based crime films.
Like the other releases by 88 Films this is an excellent package. Each movie gets a separate disc with both in a hard slipcase and includes an excellent booklet, reversable covers and a double-sided poster. The viewer has the option of enjoying the films in Cantonese with English subtitles or the export cut dubbed in English. There are plenty of interviews and both Hong Kong and English trailers. If you are a fan and have previous editions you will want to shell out for the upgrade but if you are among the uninitiated, take a chance on the purchase and you will be thrilled and completely satisfied.
Mondo New York
MVD Rewind Blu-Ray Review
I grew up in Santa Maria, a small, shithole town on the central coast of California. To this day it is chockful of rednecks, ethnic gang members, spoiled white rich kids and people just passing through. It remains a hotbed of racism, sexism, homophobia and all manner of dumbass behavior. Back in the 60’s, 70’s and 80’s as far as the film industry was concerned, the two now long-gone drive-in theatres were a good dumping ground for questionable films. I distinctly remember Herschell Gordon Lewis’ groundbreaking 1963 gore masterpiece BLOOD FEAST being screened well into the mid-seventies. George A. Romero’s NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD was a b/w film that was shown at the bottom of double and triple features for years.
As a teen me and my friends were regulars at both drive-ins. Our interest in “hard rock” was beginning to wane and punk rock was having a big influence on us and we would blast THE RAMONES’ first album on 8-track while drinking beer, snorting Black Beauties and smoking weed during the intermission. And we were total gorehounds. While screenings of films like THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (another film that seemed to pop up every few months) were what we really craved two films completely took as by surprise and both were “mondo” films.
Mondo films were pseudo-documentaries with both staged and real footage and were highly exploitive. They concentrated on showing an unsuspecting public shocking footage from cultures all over the world and the real situations usually consisted of animal violence or death. One of the “mondo” films was a spoof created by comedy master Michael O’Donoghue of Saturday Night Live fame called MISTER MIKE’S MONDO VIDEO and featured a clip of Sid Vicious singing “My Way” from THE GREAT ROCK N’ ROLL SWINDLE. The other was a film I have trouble remembering called JABBER WALK. The one thing I do remember about the film was an appearance by a band close to the hearts of me and my teenage hoodlum friends, THE DICTATORS. Over the years I remembered their appearance but forgot the name of the film.
When this film came across my review desk I was hoping it was that film. But research showed that this was not that particular film but something close to it in more ways than one. The film features Lydia Lunch in the opening. I adore Lydia but have always been apprehensive about approaching her because more than likely she would think I was a complete twat. Musician and Troma films star Phoebe Legere lip syncs a song and you get a glimpse of her pussy hair. This part of the film I enjoyed because I think shaved pussies are gross. There is a long segment with artist Joe Coleman. If you are not aware of Joe’s art you might know his work from the spectacular piece he did that was used for one of the one-sheet posters for HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER. He does his explosive live performance utilizing live mice (yes, it’s a geek act) and real explosives. There is also an interview in his crazy home.
Joe’s segment is pure performance art and it is the most interesting when compared to the others including segments with Frank Moore (with assistance from a body painted Annie Sprinkle) and Karen Finlay. There are segments with drag/cabaret artists Joey Arias (I would
have preferred a bit with murderess Jodi Arias) and Dean Johnson. Ann Magnuson and John Sex also appear but the high point of the film is the comedians performing in Washington Square Park. Charlie Barnett is the better one (easy on the Mexicans, Charlie) but Rick Aviles turns in a strong and very funny performance as well.
And what about THE DICTATORS? Well, even though this isn’t JABBER WALK there is a segment toward the end that I think was supposed to represent CBGB’s showing a mosh pit but it looks a lot cleaner than I remember CB’s being. A band that is mentioned in the booklet as being post-DICTATORS group MANITOBA’S WILD KINGDOM. The song is the Dic’s classic “New York, New York” but the band is never shown. I think you can see Handsome Dick’s shows at one point but that is it.
The disc is restored and remastered in a 2K HD transfer from the original camera negative. The picture, especially the opening bit with Lydia looks great. While the best New York films like MANIAC, TAXI DRIVER and BLOODSUCKING FREAKS all are a bit murky this film makes even the sleaziest backstreets of NYC look shiny. The packaging is excellent and features a full color booklet, a companion CD, a poster and a reversable cover. Oh yeah, there is also a Haitian Voodoo ceremony involving a chicken having its head bit off and a cock fight.